That Day

Yesterday was the day, the day I dread for at least a month leading up to it. The day that makes me cry for that month leading up to it. And I didn't write on that day because it's sad and I didn't want to write a sad entry. But although this year, four years since my Dad died, I have been a mess leading up to this day, the day was a good day.

I woke up and spent the morning visiting with my mom about our house, the sun, and babies :) Then I went to work and it was a nice day and I got a lot done, even though there are some scary changes happening there (layoffs, salary cuts, etc.). I got home and had a nice dinner with my husband and then we went for a LONG walk with the dogs. We live about 3 blocks from the power lines. And under the power lines there are nice dirt roads to walk on and Thisbe can be off her leash and RUN! The sun was setting, it was beautiful and we had a great talk about our house, the sun, and babies :). I didn't watch the video of Dad pictures last night because I decided that since I hadn't cried all day I wasn't going too.

Today Bryce dropped our "new" truck off at the mechanic and was explaining how due to some problem with the ignition my Dad and rewired the ignition and you now have to flip two switches and push a button to start it. The mechanic thought this was pretty innovative. And for the first time Bryce called my Dad his Father-In-Law. He doesn't know why, it just came out that way for the first time today.

After he died everybody would say "it will get better with time." This was my least favorite thing that people would tell me, because I didn't believe them and I still don't. My theory is, it doesn't get better, but we learn to live with it, and we have a "new" normal. Things will never be how they were before but there will be a new way and things will still be good. My Dad died around the time of "Life is Good" t-shirts. I also hate these, because life is rarely good. When life is good we have to grab it and run and remember what that was like because most of the time things are not good. Money is tight, jobs are lost, people are hurt, people die, but then there are those times when you have a good dinner, a long walk, and talk about the house, the sun, and babies :).